For all those who have not yet ordered JT’s Confections to atone for your previous 364 days of poor behavior, time is running short! Unlike Y2K, 100 gallons of bottled water, 12 cases of canned peas and a dank basement will not safe you this time. You really need to step it up and do the right thing.
Please visit jtsonfections.com and put yourself on the road of redemption. I’m just sayin….
Orders received after Friday will probably get to your better half or the A&P by Valentine’s Day, but no guarantees.
Thanks for all your support.
Your Pal and guide to a parallel universe,
PS for those who have already ordered JT’s Confections, your key to a better life will be shipped tomorrow