Gentle Reader,
As many of you women, but very few of you men know, Mother’s Day is Sunday, May 8th. This year and I want to share a few absolutes I have learned about Moms.
The first absolute truth: There are four kinds of Moms.
The sweet clueless mom. They are generally pretty cute but stop developing emotionally when they are 12. They are usually married to architects.
The cool mom. Like the sweet clueless mom, they are generally cute, however, they are emotionally mature, and allow kids to drink in their houses.They are usually married to professional athletes.
The hot creepy mom. They are scary and their houses look like an ant colony filled with teenage boys calling on their socially awkward daughters. They are usually married to accountants.
Your mom! Although you believe you are the only person with this kind of mom, 97% of all moms fall into this category. They are usually married to every dad you know.
The second absolute truth: When it comes to Mother’s day, the mother of your children is your defacto Mom (The four kinds of Moms still apply).
The third absolute truth: Mom’s do not like gifts of power washers, cordless drills, chain saws, Atari game consoles, Rain Ex, bottles of Johnny Walker, or new garbage disposals.(My father actually gave my mother a garbage disposal for Mother’s Day one year. How he was allowed to father six children is beyond my ability to reason…Can anyone say Martini???)
The fourth absolute truth: All Mom’s love a gift from JT’s Confections!!!
confections So gentle reader here is some free advice for you. For this Mother’s Day, give the mother of your children, or your actual mother, a gift basket or a box of gourmet chocolates from JT’s Confections. It’s as easy as logging onto JTSCONFECTIONS.COM and making it happen! Please note the earth has moved 3000 miles closer to the sun over the last 12 months and things have warmed up. Be aware of where you want your order sent and make sure the temperature is appropriate.
Also note: local orders may be picked up.
As always, thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts; it’s been a pleasure.
Your Pal and Guide to a Parallel Universe,
JT
Consider for a moment the way you see your husband and the way he sees himself.